List to teachers to help my daughter with social skills:)

September 16th, 2008

1. Encourage her to talk with kids when it is appropriate (she feels the rule is “no talking AT ALL” in school & obeys it happilyJ

2. Have Sarah pick a buddy to be with instead of someone that may not be reinforcing to her-boy or girl will do as she sometimes likes being around the boys moreJ

3. Let the kids help her play-I have no problem with them gently encouraging/bossing if they are trying to help herJ ex. Audrey can you help Sarah with playing outside today-I usually do this in playgroup we have for her and the other kids love to help her-they just think she is shy & speech is behind.

4. Congratulate her with verbal rewards at all attempts she makes at being social or verbal towards kids-it will increase her motivation to do it againJ

5. Let her read sometimes to the class-if they think it is cool for her to be able to do that then they may approach her more…she has a hard time approaching them right nowL

6. Just FYI…. these requests would be the same ones if her ABA consultant/therapists was shadowing her in class; which I did do in kinderkids but public school won’t allow that in Texas and she is doing well with youJ

7. She loves to help others by being in a “teacher” and would benefit helping other kids if they need help with letters or words or anything you can come up with. She wants to be a teacher when she grows and she will need the practiceJ

8. Whatever activities in the day with Sarah… continue to get her to express what she did …it really helps when she gets to me in the afternoons because mama is “not the teacher” so she refuses to answer me.

9. Prompt her to look, smile, hold hands, especially if she is really zoned out. She loves it when you hold her hand in the afternoons-grins from ear to earJ

10. PRINT THIS FOR REFERENCE & THANK YOUJJJJJJJJJJJ

A list of goals I gave to ALL of Sarah’s Teachers for first grade:)

September 16th, 2008

1. ALL TEACHERS INVOLVED GET AUTISM SPECIALIST TO TRAIN THEM IN AUTISM AND HOW IT AFFECTS SARAH & HOW TO HELP HER.

2. VISUAL & VERBAL PROMPTS DAILY.

3. AWAY FROM DOOR AND NOISE/DISTRACTIONS (INCLUDING LOUD & DISRUPTIVE KIDS)~SHE WILL ZONE OUT.

4. FOSTER EXPRESSIVE/SOCIAL SKILLS AT ALL TIMES WITH VERBAL FEEDBACK TO NOTE UNDERSTANDING FROM SARAH.

5. ENCOURAGE SARAH TO PARTICIPATE & VERBALIZE AT ALL TIMES. WILL REMAIN QUIET IF NOT ENCOURAGED OR PROMPTED.

6. NEVER LAST IN LINE~LOSES GROUPL

7. GIVE VERBAL CUES OF TRANSITIONS: TO AVOID MELTDOWNS.

8. WORK ON COMPREHENSION WITH STORIES/WORK IN HER WRITING AND ILLUSTRATIONS/VERBAL COMPREHENSION. READING SKILLS VERY HIGH BUT VERBAL FEEDBACK IS POOR COMPARATIVELY.

9. **NEEDS MUCH HELP WITH:

DECLARATIVE SPEECH/EXPRESSIVE/PRAGMATICS AND SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT. SHE IS CHOPPY, FRAGMENTED AND SOMETIMES MUMBLES RESPONSES~UNABLE TO MAINTAIN CONVERSATION.

10. INCREASE SOCIAL MOTIVATION & RECIPR0CATING IDEAS AND OFFERING FEEDBACK TO OTHERS IDEAS AND THOUGHTS.

11. HELP HER TO BE ABLE TO VERBALIZE NEEDS SUCH AS ASSISTANCE WITH WORK/PROJECTS ECT..OR REPORTING THINGS SUCH AS POTTY/PAIN/BULLIESL

12. LOTS OF PRAISE FOR ANY PARTICIPATION WITH OTHERSJ

13. FEEDBACK FROM ALL TEACHERS AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK TO HELP KEEP GOALS FRESH AND FOCUSED ON & HELPS PARENTS TO WORK ON THINGS AT HOME.

14. CLOSE TO TEACHERS AT ALL TIMES~WATCH OUT FOR OTHER KIDS OUTCASTING HERL

15. ENCOURAGE HER TO SPEAK LOUDER, INCREASE MORE SPONTANEOUS LANGUAGE~WILL SPEAK ONLY WHEN PROMPTED TO’’ SHE FEELS SCHOOL IS A “NO TALKING” ZONE AND NEEDS TO KNOW WHEN TALKING IS OKAYL

Note for teachers:

August 7th, 2008

1) What is the perfect learning environment?

Depends on the child..some kids are visual and some are auditory so I would use lots of visuals:posters, schedules, calendars..ect~

Kids do better when they know what to expect..it lessons tantrums and meltdowns considerably.ect..

Also the room can be overstimulating for lots of kids on the spectrum so I wouldnt have things plastered all over the walls and items hanging down from the ceiling~too distracting.

Noise can be a huge problem so I would try to keep the room quite as possible as well as dimming the lights~they actually hurt some kiddos eyes!

My child has to be near the teacher and I dont like her near the open door~too many distractions…so that she can stay focused on what the teacher is saying.

Some kids have lots of sensory issues that take over.. so a quiet space with bean bags to sit in & read books is nice. Maybe some noise reduction headphones on hand..they come in handy:)

Sensory bins: rice & beans..water table with toys, playdough and cookie cutter shapes..ect..are wonderful and very reinforcing!

I would have some kind of reward system for the kids to earn tokens, or stickers…for good behavior and get a little something from a treasure box on fridays(fill with pencils, stickers, dollar store toys..ect….this will do wonders for noncompliance and kids that need to learn control and doing demands & transitioning skills. Reward everything good..ignore all inappropriate.

Clear verbal instructions with visuals and repetition works best on our kids~my child has to give verbal feedback that she actually understands..just because she looks like she is listening or nods doesnt always mean she totally understood the instructions.

The teacher that gets my child motivated the most is one that is excited to be her teacher and really enjoys being with kids…think “cheerleader” mentality…it is what works for my kid..If the teacher is burned out and just going through the motions my child feels it and wont comply. Parents note this in teachers as well.

My child is mainstreamed and never has been in a class for autism but this would be the idea room/situation for my child personally. Since she is HFA I wish that teachers would pair her with another child to help her socially..boy/girl it doesnt matter..just someone that likes to nurture and help my child..this has not happened thus far no matter how much I request it? I still keep asking though:)

I would also use every opportunity to encourage language and social skills..lots of verbal modeling and using the Modelmekids dvd’s on “Time for school” and “Time for a playdate” ….I would actually use these as instructional dvd’’s~They come with a CD rom (free) so that you can reinforce the skills taught in dvd by making little social books for them to take home and go over them.

Repetition of skills need to be practiced over and over so parents and teachers should use any opportunity to use the skills taught in the classroom as much as possible:)

Never underestimate their understanding..even nonverbal kids with no expressions at all are able to give total recall later on when they do get language so always keep this in mind when talking to them and how you treat them:) My daughter can recall everything that went on when she was non-verbal even though she at the time did not look at us or respond…she still remembers many events now and with detail!

ABA techniques work very well for our kids and I would get some instruction/seminar training as well as read as much as you can on it…it is the most effective means of teaching skills to our kids~A proven fact:)

Behaviors that are inappropriate should be handled consistently by ALL that are working with that child….a “FBA” “Functional Behavioral Analysis” should be done to see what caused the behavior>Before,during and after to see if it can be resolved before the behaviors start. The consequence has to be something the child doesnt like..usually a time out or a token taken away..again..depends on the child and what motivates them to behave.

May need an expert (BCBA) if the behavior needs dire attention asap… a program is written with the behavior in mind (before/during/after) and all involved must follow the consequence & reward system of plan at school and at home:)

Lots of parental involvement and everyone on the same page or else all your time and energy is wasted efforts. Lots of meetings when necessary:)

Parents are key to their childs likes and dislikes so use them…they need to be heard and not disregarded. This happens way too much and one of the top complaints amoung parents~no one will listen and many teachers have pre-conceived ideas of their child without even hearing the parent out~who truely know their child the most. Lots of patience for both the teacher and parents are needed in this area:)

Some kind of feedback on how their kid is doing and often makes us very happy & allows us something to talk to our child about when we pick them up.especially if they are not expressing themselves yet…and for some reason it is very hard to get some teachers to do this.

Just a line here and there on what they did that day or an email to a parent on their child is SO appreciated:)

Since autism is a spectrum and no two kids are alike there is NO clear right answer but knowlege is power and if you have your heart in the right place you will go far in teaching kids on the spectrum:)

Kuddos to ALL teachers that teach special needs kids..they dont get the true thanks they deserve and it is a very tough job both physically, mentally and emotionally. A saint kind of spirit is required:)

Always being open minded to the child’s learning style and finding innovated & fun ways to teach them will keep them interested in learning:)

These are just some suggestions I feel will help your classroom…but also bring your own personality and soul into the room..the kids will love you!

EASY SOCIAL SKILLS GAME:)

May 30th, 2008

All our kiddos seem to love balls..we made a social game out of them by getting really inexpensive solid colored balls large enough to write pictures on or words if your child can read.

You can purchase several balls and play 1:1 with your child or get as many participants as you want and as many themes as you can think when doing this game:)

This is the social ball games we did: Our child could read so it was easier to just write words but simple pics could work too I believe…make it as easy as you want and add on as you go:)

Emotions ball: (have each person act out the emotion picked out either by therapist, child, parent..)

Write:

  • Happy
  • sad
  • excited
  • sleepy
  • mad
  • hungry
  • silly
  • shy
  • cold
  • hot
  • ect..

Pretend Ball:

  • Animals~farm animals, zoo animals, pets..ect..
  • occupations~doctor, teacher, fireman, ballerina, superman, cook..ect

Expressive ball:

  • favorites~food, toys, shows, friends, colors, songs, candy..ect
  • dance, hula hoop, jumping jacks, hop on one foot, give high 5’s to each others, turn around, shake your booty..ect:)

Tell me Ball:

  • age, boy/girl, grade in school, phone #, city you live in, sibs names, parents names, friends names, grandparents names, pets names, ect….

Ask Ball: Use same ball as above but they have to ask you:)

As your child progresses you can variate and make the games as hard as you want…I had my daughter in a ABA social skill playgroup for almost 3 years and we came up with these ball games and they loved them..it really helped both the asd kiddos and the nt kids get to know each other better.

Getting your child to engage you: Social Skills

April 22nd, 2008

One of the first things in getting your child to engage with you is to get in his/her space and just be with them without intruding their space or making demands on them.  I remember our first ABA therapist came to our house in jeans and t-shirt..took off her shoes and went in livingroom and just sat next to Sarah very gently..like a lamb:) Sarah paid no attention to her at all and after a few minutes Sarah got up and went to the sunroom and the therapist quiet as a mouse slowly shadowed her into the sunroom too…no words just smiling. This went on for 6 hours! The next day the therapist brought a bag of toys with her and proceeded the same protocol but this time my dd looked at her with interest~surely because of the goody bag but that was the plan! The therapist took out a bottle of bubbles and had Sarah look at her before she would blow the wand..it took a few times before Sarah caught on to “Look at me” to get to see those wonderful bubbles but she figured it out:) The therapists cheered like a crazy cheerleader how happy she was that Sarah looked at her and blew bubbles over and over! This was the beginning of a beautiful relationship:) More to come!

A Parent’s Story…

April 7th, 2008

Hello Everyone!

My name is Shelley and I have a beautiful daughter named Sarah who has HFA and doing well in first grade and this is our story.

In the beginning when she first got diagnosed she had the ALL of the following:

  • No eye contact
  • No pointing
  • Appeared deaf
  • No awareness of others including meL
  • No language
  • Night terrors
  • Could not tolerate noise or large crowds at all
  • Ate less than 5 foods
  • Flat affect
  • Extremely aloof
  • Toe walked

We first got the diagnoses of autism from pediatrician who informed me she may never talk or have emotional connections~this same pediatrician was my oldest daughter’s doctor for almost ten years so I was in total shock. I was given no information or manual on what to do or resources. I was just given the diagnoses and sent home.  I then had her seen by a pediactric neurologist for the toe walking and he stated she was pdd which I asked what was the difference between that and autism? His response was they are both the same but since Sarah had no stims or behaviors that stood out she got a lesser label of pdd…still no manual or information of what to do. I finally got her to a developmental pediatrician who did a full evaluation on her for 3 hours and told me she was mild to moderate autistic and why & a few surprises I didn’t even notice but the best part was he gave me a folder full of information on what to do!

The greatest advice he gave me was that Autism is treatable and early intervention is crucial!  He told me to keep her engaged at all times as much as I could…this was a unimaginable feat since she was so aversive to anyone at the time. 

I was also told to get her into ABA therapy as many hours as I could to teach her skills that she would not be able to learn as her peers would automatically.

 I was lucky to live nearby a college that taught ABA and had BCBA program so within 2 weeks I had a full program in place for Sarah of 30 hours a week and also 2 hours of speech in place too. I also read “Let Me Hear Your Voice”  by Catherine Maurice about a mom that used ABA to recover both her kids with autism.   

It really motivated me to get real busy~ I even made my husband read it since all this therapy was going to be paid for out of pocket I needed him to be as passionate about getting it for her as I was.

We did ABA for almost 4 years along with a special diet/ABA playgroup and all of Sarah’s issues that got her diagnosed initially have now completely resolved! 

She is completely mainstreamed in school since kindergarten with no supports and the only thing I am helping her on is social skills.  She is able to mix well with kids and has no problems playing games and joining them but she hasn’t made a special best friend yet..we are working on itJ

I hope to give other parents inspiration and share all the things we have done to get her to this point. It was a lot of hard work but so worth it!  

Below is a picture of Sarah when she first started ABA therapy & had no interest in play or eye contact~the second picture is how she looks today after therapy~fully engaged with us!

sarahstherapists.jpg ABA Session picture by Shelleyr_2007

sweetysmile.jpg After ABA therapy picture by Shelleyr_2007

Welcome to our Social Skills Blog!

April 6th, 2008

This is a place for ideas related to social skills training, inclusive education, social skills in the community, and other social skills issues.

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